Gainfully Unemployed

2010-06-09, 11:29 p.m.
I started this entry quite a while ago, so it�s all pretty much out of date now, but in the absence of anything more exciting to write about, Im going to go with the old news and just hope it�s still mildly entertaining.

Oh, and the �N� key has broken off my laptop. There�s just a rubbery little nodule where the N should be and it�s driving me mental to type on it. I assume these things can be glued back on, but not at 10.40 at night, in a house where the only glues to hand are sachets of wallpaper paste (yet to be made up), some pritt which has gone a bit hard and probably wouldn�t stick and some of that glitter glue stuff which is really only good for decorating stuff as, if you try to stick stuff with it, you cant see the glitter and that seems to pretty much defeat the object of it having glitter in it in the first place!

So. I left my crummy job. So far the world doesn�t appear to have caved in, no reports of rifts appearing in the time-space continuum, no plagues of locusts, frogs falling from the skies, rivers of blood. Nothing like that at all. It�s as if it didn�t really matter. Atonishing.

Of course, I am now officially poor but am refusing (at the moment) to say that I am unemployed. I prefer �semi retired� or possibly �taking a sabbatical�. Whatever. I�m just not doing it any more.

What I am doing an awful lot of, is sleeping � and when I�m not sleeping I�m thinking about how long it might be until I get to do it again (sleep, that is!) which leads me to hypothesise that I may be suffering from mild burn-out. Obviously, I�d like one or two of you lot to concur (so I feel a bit less like a whiny skiver), but I really cannot think of anything I want to do less right now than jump back onto the corporate ladder and start all that ridiculous climbing all over again. My heart�s just not in it, boys and girls, not when there are cakes to be baked and children to be cuddled and households to run and all sorts of living to be lived.


Not sure what I was thinking of with regard to the latest pube-trimming exercise. I seemed to have inadvertently ended up with a dinky little upward pointing arrowhead which looks kinda cute in a �there�s no need for anyone�s pubes to be that styled� sort of way and which I suspect is going to itch like holy hell when it starts to grow out.

I blame the fact that I was committing the trimmage whilst having a bath and therefore had to do a kind of weird �lifting foo above the waterline� crab-like pose to be able to see what I was doing. That doesn�t exactly present one with a stable surface for one�s Gillette Mach III and can be downright dangerous if one has filled the bath pretty much with a solution of 1 part water: 2 billion parts bergamot bath oil, in the hope that the scent would banish my sinus headache (It didn�t. If it did, then God wouldn�t have had to invent Sinutab, would he? *tssk*). So, it wasn�t until I�d �re-dunked� and washed off the foam that I could see that what I�d thought was �general neatening and thinning� was actually more like �utter removal of indiscriminate patches whilst leaving other areas untouched and verdant�. I had to do some serious tidying up to stop my ladygarden looking like it had had some kind of radiation sickness alopecia. I�m not sure that sporting �The Chernobyl� is going to attract any kind of recreational visitors � not even drunk musicians who aren�t particularly picky at the best of times.

Sidenote: I can hear the icecream van. Sadly, I know from bitter experience that he is driving his wagon o� dreams around the housing estate that backs onto my (slightly posh) street, and not along my street itself. He never comes to our street. The middle classes have no need for Mr Whippy, it seems. *feels cheated*

Anyways. I was a�bathing and a�trimmin in honour of actually going out for the evening to somewhere other than the bloody workies. Our shockingly wealthy friends Craig and Lina were treating us to an evening out. We didn�t know where, it was to be a surprise, but I was pretty sure it would be the sort of place where untrimmed pubes are frowned upon.

Once Id finished bathing, I got out and pulled the plug out before skipping downstairs to phone L and tell him I was �going for a nap�, which was supposed to be code for �come home � I�m in bed and drowsy and naked, do with me what you will� but before I could start dialling I realised something was amiss.

Now, I�m no plumber, but I�m pretty sure that, when you pull the plug out of the bath, the water doesn�t normally pour down through the wall cavity and out of the kitchen cupboards.


Its now several days later. Plumbers have been around and fixed the plumbing for nothing (after sending me a cheeky text saying �stay in the bath I�ll be right �round�). We went out with Craig and Lina and it was a very nice dinner at a swanky hotel and a Liza Minelli drag act cabaret. I�m not a massive Liza Minelli fan, but I like a drag act and he was a pretty good singer so no harm done. I couldn�t face staying overnight in their pool house � mostly because I�m very VERY scared of their dog � even tho the offer was there, and in the end Lina was so completely wankered that she pretty much poured out of the car and it was apparent there was no chance of a nightcap nor any kind of hostessy type niceties, so we went home, where there was whisky and chatting and winding down to be done. L�s not keen on drag acts, nor Liza Minelli, but he though the dinner was nice so that was good.


Ive been in to my old office to do a handover (and I�m going back tomorrow for a bit more) and its clear that my old boss is becoming madder with every passing hour. Ive heard what she�s planning to do with my old project and its so far off the mark that (once they�ve finished paying me) I�m going to rat her in to the project sponsors. I�m not a snitch but people who desperately need help will suffer if she goes ahead and that just doesn�t sit very well with me. Top-slicing is an unpleasant practice in the commercial field. In the charitable sector its inexcusable.


Gainful employment-wise, things are kind of OK, thanks fer askin�. Ive registered as self-employed and this week Ive got two sessions of training � doing facilitation for �my� project but for the providers working in the next county. A nice bit of cash, plus 40p/mile expenses. I can do one or two of these sessions per week for the rest of the summer and that should keep things ticking along OK � not enough to pay the mortgage but that�s covered until September anyways so the cash I�m bringing in now is good for groceries and bits and pieces of spending loot.

Ive also been around to Jooj�s school and volunteered in their ILN (individual learning needs) dept. I�m doing two mornings a week, with around five pupils per morning. Hopefully, if I can be impressive enough up until the end of term in July then some kind of nice little part time job might materialise for next term. The teacher who runs the department said they�re �always� looking for people and that jobs come up �all the time�. Fingers crossed Gs and Bs, if you don�t mind. Ta everso.


back soon (or at least wont leave it 21 flippin days next time, yeh?)

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