Snooooooze

2008-05-15, 11:03 p.m.
Hello dears!

Hmm, lemme see now, what�s been happening?

Ummm���nope. Nothing.

Bit of work, bit of wedding stuff, nothing much.

*sigh*. You�re gonna want more than that, aren�t you? Okaaaaaay then. *sulks*

Tuesday I got to knock off work at 3 and go home and go to bed for a couple of hours. That�s because I had to get up again at 11pm, drive to my dopey co-worker M�s house in a fuck-off big Transit van full of crap and then travel up to London to Covent Garden Flower Market for an exhibition. We got to the market at 2.30am and started unloading the van, ready for the market to open at 3. Flower markets are fucking freezingclimate controlled so we obviously weren�t dressed in our usual sharp little business suits. This made it all the more odd that there were QUITE so many whoops, hollers and shouts of �Mornin� Darlin�!� from the assembled flower traders. M and I were dressed in our ultra sexy Twat Inc reversible waterproof fleecy jackets (one size fits nobody � unless you happen to have a body the size of an airship and enormously long spider-monkey arms, that is) with jeans and clumpy sensible shoes (actually, M had Ugg boots on, which aren�t exactly renowned for their vice-like grip on the floor, meaning that she was slipping and sliding all over wet leaves and bits of vegetation and puddles of spilled coffee and generally falling on her arse a bit). Id had the foresight to whack a bit of makeup on before leaving the house, so I didn�t look too much like Eminem, but it was hardly a high-fashion gig nonetheless.

M is a titchy, skinny little thing, so she could only carry the small stuff, leaving me to handle the slightly larger items�.like the 48� plasma screen and the 6� stand it goes on, the lighting rig, and�ummm�well, everything actually. Oh no, hang on, she DID carry my handbag for me. I was pushing a huge porters trolley, seemingly made from girders and easily large enough to carry a single bed (or a 48� plasma screen � in its box), so I wasn�t particularly enamoured that she was moaning that my bag was a bit heavy.

By the time VM & SB turned up at 3.30, we�d unloaded the van and had started setting up the exhibition stand and by about 4ish we were good to go. Then we sat around in the freezing cold. And we sat. And we sat. And we sat. We�d been promised a �high footfall�, so we had made ourselves a little picnic area (with fake grass, natch) and were serving little cakies and pastries and glasses of juice to draw in the punters and hopefully get some quality leads that we could follow up next week and hopefully convert into clients. Our main competitors were there, too, but they just had a little stand, with a few flowers on it and two nice ladies sat at a desk. We felt a bit sorry for them until slow realisation dawned that we had, most definitely, been sold a pup. There were no more than 150 visitors the whole morning, despite the presence of TWO camera crews from the BB bloody C. At 9am, Troy phoned me to see how it was all going. We were already packing up to go home. I was going to lie and say we were still hard at it, to buy us all a bit more lieu-time for the inconvenience, but M chose the exact moment to fall over the (already dismantled) lighting rig and the resultant shouts of distress/concern meant tat Troy instantly knew we weren�t working. So I fessed up and told her we�d taken only 6 leads (and that was stretching it a bit � it was really only two decent leads, the others aren�t likely convert) and that it was a monumental waste of time and effort and that we were all fucked off and cold and miserable and were going home. She was kind of OK about it.

VM and SNB and M had started to get whiny and grizzle and generally piss me off so, as I was �leading� I suggested we get the hell out of there as quickly as possible. They think I was being kind but it was actually just to stop me stabbing them all. The final straw was as we were taking the fucking stupidly heavy and enormous plasma screen off its stand. As the tallest/strongest, I had to climb the stand (yup!) and take the holding screws out of the brackets, while the others (yes. THREE of them) held the screen. The screws were only in finger-tight but we had no screwdriver and it took me some time to unscrew the fucking things with my poor frozen fingers, whilst perched in midair. The bitching and moaning about how long it was taking was enough to have had even Mother Theresa yelling �Aww, shut the fuck up!� so I was quite pleased that I only did a little clenched teeth �I�m. Doing. My. Best.�

Once it was all safely back in the van (yup. Me on the trolley again! My biceps are like Arnie�s today!) we could set off for home, SB and VM in their car, me and M in the van. Through central London, in the midday traffic. With the SatNav confusing us at every turn. That my dumbass BF got a new chip for the Satnav to make the �voice� sound like John Cleese doesn�t make it any more hilarious when you are hopelessly lost cos there�s roadworks and the street you need to go down is closed. Meh.

Still, once we got to Chiswick I knew the way home, which was just as well as M fell asleep, lolling her head this way and that in a comical fashion (which I have teased her about mercilessly today) and didn�t wake up until we got to Southampton, which is only about 10 miles from her house. I sung along to the radio to keep myself awake and drank a coupla cans of redbull even tho it tastes like piss. Got home about 1.30pm and went for a wee nap. Got up in time to pick Treacle up from school at 3.30 and went back home for dinner.

In the evening I�d promised to go to Jooj�s Theatre Club AGM � but only as she�d told me it �would only be for an hour, mum�. I was starting to feel very light-headed from the lack of sleep but a promise is a promise. The AGM did, indeed, only last about an hour but then there was a �cabaret�, �showcasing� the �best� in �performances� from the young �talent�. Yes, all those words really DO need to be in inverted commas. Just when I thought it would be OK for us to sneak away, the President asked for some volunteer mums and dads from the audience and twenty of us were bullied into stepping up on the stage. I had Bad Becky and Dylan with me as well as Jooj, so I didn�t have much chance of ducking out of it. �It� turned out to be the formation of an instant four part harmony group to sing �You�ll Never Walk Alone�. Never have I been so fucking glad that the soprano part is the main melody! When it was all over, Jooj and Bad Becky and Dylan said I was the best (�well, the only one we could HEAR, anyway�) and slapped me on the back a lot and said I was a sport. I thought we�d be able to go then, but there was more. And more. And more. Songs from this show and that show and songs with dance routines and songs with wibbly solos from boys whose voices are nano-seconds from breaking. I must have sighed cos a little Jooj-hand came over and squeezed my arm. Got out of there a little after 10 and drove Bad Becky and Dylan home before getting back to The Palace of Many Sins. Lee and BF had been working on a lighting set up for the wedding marquee and spread it all out on the lawn for me to see. When they switched it on, it lit up the whole garden and was lovely and I (nearly) forgot that I had been up for 24 hours.

Had a glass of bourbon, made the packed lunches for today and went to bed.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzz

Back to the office this morning to unpack the van � Slaveboy is back from his hols in Gran Canaria, mooning over a holiday romance which appears to have gone sour already. The hunky object of his affections is resolutely ignoring his ever more desperate emails and, I suspect, wasn�t quite as keen on dear Slaveboy as he would have him believe. Awww. It�s a shame. Slaveboy is sighing and saying things like ��.but I thought he really LIKED me!� and �He seemed so KEEN�, so we have been saying that we expect his squeeze has just been really busy, what with having been away from work for a couple of weeks and all, but we all kind of know the truth, don�t we girls?!

Troy called me in for an exhibition �debrief� which turned into a rant about how much I hate my job and wish I the clients were dead. I even went a bit tearful at one point but I think that�s just cos Im still stupidly tired.

Got through the day OK and then went to pick my mum up so she could come with me to get my wedding dress. The dressmaker�s done a lovely job and it does look a little bit splendid, even if I do say so myself! The pre-wedding diet seems to have paid off as it wasn�t nearly as �snug� as it was the last time I tried it on. I hardly had to hold my breath at all. In celebration, I took my mum for a pub dinner on the way home and had pie and chips. Delicious.

Jooj and Treac had stayed up to see me when I got home and I put on my dress and all the other crap for them to see. Apparently, I am beautiful. Must make them some opticians appointments tomorrow.

Think I might need to do something with my head-dress thingy as I appear to have been a bit heavy-handed with the glitter. Luckily, quite a lot of it has fallen off all over the hall carpet during the trying-on process but I think it could still do with a little remedial assistance if I am not to look utterly ridiculous on the day.

Two weeks to go and still huge amounts to do. Sure it will all come right in the end.

Maybe.

Got contacted through Friends Reunited today by a lad I used to sit opposite in Eng Lit. It was a nice message, saying how he�d remembered me being pretty (!) and hoped I was doing OK. He�s married with a couple of kids so I sent a nice chatty reply saying Hi and thanking him for his note. After I�d clicked Send, I Googled him. OMG! He�s, like, a SUPER famous lawyer who�s been on TV a squillion times and is the resident expert in his particular branch of law!!!! And he was such a quiet shy wee thing. Somehow, that kind of makes it even cooler that he took the time to contact a girl who barely gave him the time of day twenty-odd years ago, love him.

Put a smile on my face, anyways.

Later
S
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