It wasnt a really proper party cos we all went bowling on Sunday. When I say "we all" I mean just Jooj and Treac and two little friends and me and Shagnasty (BF was working and, in any case, bowling is a Dangerous Sport for guitarists. So Im told. It might just be that BF is crap at bowling. Who knows.). Two other little friends who were supposed to be there, cried off at the last minute but we (I!) had already paid for six kids (the minimum for a Party Package!) so Shagnasty and I had to pretend to be Eric and Lottie and take their turn with the bowling ��and the chicken nuggets and curly fries.
I think the last time I went bowling with Shagnasty was in 1986. That�s a while ago by anyone�s standards. He�s quite good at bowling so he was winning by miles. Then he got a strop on because the scoreboard thingy mis-counted one of his pins. I presented the choices:
a) Complain to the management and have one of the dim-witted teenagers behind the counter manually adjust the scoring to include the forgotten pin.
b) Accept that, at an 8 years old�s birthday bowling party, a 43 year old man is likely to be the best bowler there EVEN WITH AN ARBITRARY REDUCTION OF ONE TO HIS SCORE.
Then I waited��.
Eventually he said �awww, I�ll just leave it, shall I?�
I hope my glower was taken as assent.
Midway through the party the teenage party helpers take all the kiddies up to the front of the lanes for dancing and general party noise-making. I went too cos I am a spaz I wanted to keep a check on the children. We did some Oops Upside Yer Head and some Superman and some Cha-cha Slide and then after Id left foot two stomps, right foot two stomps, sliiiide to the left, cha-cha now y�all, turn around I noticed that I was BEING VIDEOD by the dad of a kid at a neighbouring party. I do know this dad (and some of the other dads who were with him), so I guess it was kind of OK, but keep an eye on Youtube for �Middle Aged Woman Thinks She�s All That at Bowling Party�, wont you!
When we left I got lots of kisses and Happy Christmases from the neighbouring dads�and one or two slightly off-colour comments about my dancing prowess which made me embarrassed and flattered at the same time. I was also kind of smug to notice that, even tho all these dads also knew Shagnasty (our kids were at school together at the posh private school), not one of them even said hello to him. Ha!
We STILL haven�t got our Christmas tree up�or even out of the loft! We did do the new white one in the conservatory, but that�s really only there to coordinate with the d�cor, rather than to make a seasonal statement. We�ve got a ginormous green one for the sitting room. Maybe we�ll do it this weekend. Maybe I�ll do some Christmas shopping, too. Jooj doesn�t appear to actually WANT anything so Im not sure how Im gonna deal with that.
Work is so horribly busy already � this is the first of our peak periods (the other two being Valentine�s Day and Mothers Day) and I�ll be working Christmas Eve and New Years Eve. Tomorrow Ive got to drive across country to get my photo taken presenting one of those giant cheques to a charity we support � a two hour round trip for ten minutes of smiling and pretending to shake hands. I guess I need to get a small cheque that the charity can take to the bank � you don�t actually pay in those giant great big cheques, do you? Hee hee, imagine trying to get that under the little window slot thingy at the bank! Heee hee hee�Im just gonna have a little giggle about that for a bit.
Jooj phoned me at work today to tell me they�d had a quiz at school. It was a picture quiz and they�d all swapped papers afterwards to do the scoring. One of the pictures was of Nelson Mandela. On the paper which Jooj was marking, the respected world leader had been identified as �God, out of Bruce Almighty�. I laughed for about an hour. Im sure Morgan Freeman would�ve found it funny too.
BF is missing his kids dreadfully. Its always worse at Christmastime. We just found out they are in New York for Christmas and New Year. Id say �nice if you can afford it� but, of course, she can. She had �150K ($300K) of BFs money when his house sold.
Christmas is always just a little bit crap in our house. BF drinks too much and cries for lost loved ones. I force feed people and don�t get enough time off work to have any fun.
Jooj and Treacle are at Shagnasty�s for most of the holidays. We have them here just for Boxing Day and then back again over New Year as Shagnasty is taking his girlfriend to Dubrovnik (�well, she needs a break�). Its just me and BF on Christmas Day. My family are all in Bruges at my sister�s house. Id like to get a big fat lobster tail to eat on Christmas Day but I haven�t actually had time to do any grocery shopping for two weeks and cant see when I might get time to go to the supermarket so I think we�ll be having Weetabix. And pistachios. And curry flavour instant noodles.