Part Two in an occasional series of features on fucking ridiculous things my dumbass co-workers say in all seriousness (for Part one you'll need to trawl through my archives cos I cant remember what the page was called. Sorry!):
Gonna quickly run through a few things that have been happening and hope that, by the weekend, I'll have cought up wiht myself enought to actually write a proper entry with information and humour and readability and everything.
Firstly, my job still sucks a donkeys cock, thanks fer askin'. Ive started applying for other things and also had a big meeting with our HR manager today at which I used the expressions "grievance procedure", "constructive dismissal", "catalogue of lies" and "climate of misogyny" (although I might have spelled that wrong as Im not typing in Word so there's no wiggly line and it does LOOK a bit funny. I'll check later). I didnt cry or bang my fist on the table or call ANYone a cock-sucking toadying Wank-Break*. The nice HR Manager shook her head a lot and made loads of notes. She said "you have my assurance that this will not. just. go. away. I promise you that I will deal with this." I dont know if she will or not, but it was nice that she said it.
Me and the lovely BF had a big big fight with me bawling my eyes out on the kitchen floor and lots of snot and wailing and stuff like that. It was mostly about money (which we dont have) and how it is allocated - mine: bills and the mortgage and the food and stuff for the kids, his: beer. and wine. We're friends again now and he has been making a real effort to stay out of the pub and not be such a cunt. He also told me something which Im not sure Im ready to share with you lot yet. Dont worry its not a bad thing.
I cant have a sports car in time for my birthday as I cant afford it (cf para above!). I am, nevertheless currently spending like a sailor on my *mumble*th birthday party which is in 16 DAYS TIME and includes such features as: hog roast, many and several overnight guests of varying magnitude, lots of musicians, oh and forcing BF to renegotiate with the bakers so that I will have more money to spend on necessities like whisky and star shaped helium balloons. In addition, I am taking my lovely BF and my lovely children out for a slap up chinese banquet on my actual really birthday day and we're gonna eat EVERYTHING. Even the stuff we usually skip over cos its a bit expensive.
The children are currently in Spain with their daddy. At least I THINK they are as they havent phoned at all. I am refusing to make an issue out of that.
I have a freezer full of sloes in readiness for this autumn's sloe gin making extravaganza. We also got loads of blackberries in readiness for crumbles-yet-to-come. Yay for free food.
I have to go now.
bye
s
x
*In case you were wondering, a Wank-Break is someone that is brought into a company and seems to be a really good idea at first, but then everyone starts to realise that they've managed quite well without one up until now and could really, actually, probably do without it.
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