Get Smashed!

2007-09-24, 9:05 p.m.
And here is Smash!

*padz discreetly into The Palace of Many Sins*

Ooh! All quiet.

*wonders if people are hiding behind the curtains ready to jump out and attack him and gives low warning growlz*

Nope, no one there.

Hmm.

*takes a beer from the fridge � she always has some in, bless her! � and sits down*

Now no, I haven�t taken up housebreaking as a part time job, Stepfie asked me to pop in and fluff up the cushions and just generally fart around so no would-be burglars see the place as fair game.

She�s really busy at the moment � work is hectic and coupled with a stupidly short rehearsal time, she asked to fling together a guest entry for her.

So here I am!

Naturally I readily and uncomplainingly agreed.

The added bonus is she doesn�t have me down as a guest entry writer � which is so NOW, people! Your guest list is incomplete without the Smash dude on it! � and so had to give me the password for her wonderful piece of literary goodness.

*growlz and grinz evilly*

It�s so unfair, I just took a nosey at her stats, and she has got way more than me.

Well, except for the past two days cos she hasn�t updated in like, forever.

So yeah, I'm Smash, I said that, right?

Some of you know me I guess, since Stepfie and I tend to move in the same diaryland circles.

But ya know, I think this is a first for Stepfie, an entry by her gas mashin bro.

What would she expect me to write about, I wonder? Well, cars, babes, maybe?

Ok, here�s a picture of one of my favourite rides, the Mitsubishi Evo IX, which, having driven a VII and had the time of my life, would assumedly be great fun to drive!

When Smashy said he was nippin� out for a smoke, he thought how foolish of people to assume he meant a cigarette�

Of course I could post some picture of a hot babe with awesome bappage, but I kinda think that might get this entry deleted.

So instead Ill just mention it:

BABES WITH BIG AWESOME SNUGGLY SNUG AND DELICIOUSLY TASTY BAPPAGE ROCK!

*cough*

Right.

I have to say the Stepfie is most hospitable.

In �real life� too, I mean.

Of course Stepfie and I first met on my turf, in sunny Scouseland. She was warned by one and many that meeting some big scary growlly dude meant she was going to get murdered by some big scary growlly dude with a big scary growlly axe!

Can axes growl, Smash?

Look, we�ll leave that till later, okay?

Naturally being British, though we met at the station � I needed to buy cigs � we repaired to that brilliant place where all British people meet psycho axe murdering strangers � even on TV � that is, the pub.

We exchanged hugz aplenty and then sat down and got pissed and talked bollocks for hours, occasionally having BF drop by to join in with aforementioned waffly bollocks.

He is an awesome dude, and didn�t once give me the �you hittin� on me bird?� vibes which, to be fair, he would have been well within his rights to do so.

And he didn�t get bitchy when a rather worse for wear Stepfie and I sat on the couch in a music shop watching him demonstrate a guitar whilst succumbing to uncontrollable fits of laughter. Think schoolboy sniggering to their first ever seen titty magazine.

Classic!

And of course two visits to The Palace of Many Sins have since been taken � and thoroughly enjoyed � for which I am truly in the debt of both Stepfie and BF.

And not once have I tried to murder them in their beds with any form of sharp bladed implement.

So hopefully they feel quite comfortable around me now.

But Smash, last time you were there, didn�t you sing The Spice Girls �Wannabe� through completely, without missing a word and enjoyed it so much that you insisted on doing it all over again straightaway?

It was the drink, I swear.

Thass where the Smash dude is different you see.

Other dudes, be them rockers or indiedudes or raverkids, well, they might get pissed and argue. Or fight. Or yell and scream. Or smash stuff up.

Smash gets drunk and sings the most camp, pathetically poptastically crap songs you have ever heard in your life.

At the top of his voice.

With reckless abandon.

In your kitchen.

Well� no one likes boring conventional friends now, do they?

Adios! \m/ xxx

PS - Stepfie, I ridded you of your annoying strikethrough visited link problem! Hee!



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