Brain Bleach Please. PLEASE.

2013-06-23, 7:36 p.m.
Fucking horrible weekend. Nobody died. Or got arrested. Or filed for divorce (!) but right at the moment I wish there was an "Un-Know" button somewhere so I could push it. I cant begin to verbalise the awfulness of what I found out and even if I could, I dont know that I could bring myself to share it, lest it become more real and horrific. But yeh, an un-know button would be good right now, as would a 'turn back time' and a 'fix shit' button.


Went out last night, stupidly late, to try and catch a glimpse of the Super-Moon. It was too cloudy to see anything much but we were up on the motorway bridge again so L did some of those slow shutter-speed things with the lights of cars passing underneath and they came out pretty good. It was damn cold up there tho and we were a bit concerned that where we'd left the car might be a dogging site and we'd come back to a collection of....well, God knows what! As it was, the carpark was empty when we got back so it was either too cold and windy for dogging last night or its just a car park, near a motorway bridge.

Out again in the wind and the cold today (are you SURE its mid-June?) and went to
Netley Abbey . Never been there before, which is a bit shameful as its just up the road. Picturesque enough for an hour or so and probably much nicer on a warm day but it was proper cold and the tide was in when we got down to the shore, too, so we couldnt even have a walk by the sea.

There's a bit less cloud this evening and the Super-Moon should still be visible so we're going to go have another look for it, but this time just from the riverbank 2 minutes from our house, rather than taking our chances with icycold motorway bridges and carparks of ill repute.

Oh, I forgot to say! My dear Slavey (if youve been here for a hundred years, youll remember she was my general factotum and all round partner in crime when I was a well-paid but burnt out Captain of Industry, instead of the stress-free (!) pauper I am now) is getting married! How fabulous is that?! I'll tell you, its UTTERLY fabulous. Anyway, we went over to her house on Friday for a bit of a party and it was all very lovely indeed, except I had had a row with L before we went and spent rather too much time flirting with Slavey's brother which I felt terrible about afterwards as I really like his wife and wish she was my friend but I can kind of see why she isnt, seeing as I was hitting on her husband and all. Dammit, he's not even good looking, he's just...umm....naughty, and makes me giggle like an idiot.

"Brrrr! I'm cold!" he said. Then he yanked his shirt around until one nipple was poking out through his shirt buttons. "Do I look cold?" he said, nodding down at the nipple.

I took Salted Pumpkinseed cookies as a present as Im too poor to buy anything actually properly good and Slavey's brother's lovely wife was saying how good they were and I was trying to be all gracious but I felt like a bitch as Id just been in the garden tossing my hair around coquettishly and pouting and going gooey eyed over her husband. Meh. I am horrible.

Off to the hospital on Tuesday to see the Consultant Plastic Surgeon about Boobs 2.0. Kinda looking forward to it. But kinda apprehensive that they will say something along the lines of "we cant do anything with those and anyway, if we do, you will only go using them to be badly behaved with other people's husbands, you ho." I hope they wont. I hope they will see that Im not ready to utterly give up being hot just yet and I would kinda like to be able to wear a normal sexy bra again without one side fitting perfectly and the other side either squelching out over the top or being unattractively baggy, depending on which particular side Ive decided to fit to that day.

Oh, and Id like to go unselfconsciously on top again, please, if thats not too much trouble.

thanks everso

later
s
x
PS Just read that back and it sounds like I did something bad with Slavey's brother. I didnt. Nor would I. I am married. And I love my husband, no matter how much of a twat he is being. Just thought Id clarify that.



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