A View of the Isle of Shite

2007-08-16, 10:28 p.m.

Holiday Day 4

Kind of a better day today. When I woke up, it wasn�t actually raining. I was in the spare room, as BFs post-coital snoring was causing me to harbour homicidal thoughts and I figured it would be best to take myself away to the relative safety of the spare room futon, rather than cave his fucking noisy head in with the heel of a carelessly discarded Manolo.

The girls were already up and were lounging about in front of the TV. BF had his "manual labour" t-shirt on (ie the one with mud stains) and was looking at the digger and dump truck in meaningful ways. I threw on a pair of jeans and sent the girls upstairs to get dressed. By 11 o clock we were off to Lee-on-the-Solent. Sounds picturesque, huh?

From Lee-on-the-Solent beach you can see the twin wonders of the oil refinery AND the Isle of Wight*. I don�t know which of the two I�d prefer to sink Atlantis-like under the waves.

In the best tradition of British beaches in August, it was bloody freezing.

We had a stroll along the shore and then headed for a little caf� for some refreshment. There used to be a little caf�, near the play park, which sold cherryade in plastic bottles and hot sausage rolls. Now there�s a swanky bistro, near the play park, which sells lattes and charges �6.95 for burger and chips. Actually, it WAS a giant homemade burger, with Emmental cheese and nice salady stuff and big fat golden chips but still, our �little snack� lunch cost 30 quid. So much for a cheap day out.

After lunch, started back along the beach but, all of a sudden the heavens opened and we had to make a run for it. Dived in the car til it had nearly stopped, then crossed the road for icecreams. There�s nothing that makes it feel quite like summer, like sitting in the car, in the rain, in sweaters and boots, eating icecream.

Got lost on the way home and found��.AN ICE RINK!!!!!

I thought the nearest one was in Basingstoke (which is about 40 miles away) so to find one practically on the doorstep is just FAB.

Guess where we�re going tomorrow?! BF can�t come with us as ice-skating is classed as a �dangerous sport� for those in his profession, but Im sure me and Jooj and Treac will have a jolly old time.

Took Jooj for a haircut this afternoon. She now looks quite pleasant and a lot less emo/Goth/skanky than usual. If she wasn�t wearing an inch and a half of eyeliner, she�d probably be nearly human.

Off to do a bit more shagging now. Seemed to go quite well last night (*waggles eyebrows*), so might be worth another crack at it.

In conversation with BF last night:

Me: I look rough
BF: You�re beautiful to me
Me: You�re retarded. And blind.
BF (holding up his hand to look at fingerprints � a sure sign of �measuring blindness�): Hmmm. Cant see my prints there (moves hand) or there (moves had) Ah! There! I can see there!
Me: Hang on then, let me move my head around like that and see if I get better looking when Im out of focus.
BF (as I move my head about in front of him): Umm��..Nope. Still beautiful. Always beautiful.

What a twat.

later
s
x

*Look, I don�t just hate the Isle of Wight for no reason, you know. I lived there for three months and found it to be the most unfriendly, backward shithole of a place Ive even been � and Ive been to some shitholes. If *you guys* (and you know who you are) are looking for a REAL place to play Famous Five, Id suggest the Isle of Wight as perfect. The buses don�t run after 9 o�clock and all conversation stops when you step into a pub.

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