Wedding, Workies, Weird Weather

2007-03-19, 8:33 p.m.
So, aside from posting pictures of my boyfriend on the web, what have I been doing?

Friday was Scary Friends wedding. Had to work in the morning which was bad and good as we were astonishingly busy, what with it being Mothers Day weekend and all, but I did get to leave at 12 which meant I could get to the church on time (even after getting lost). When I got there, BF had already set up guitars and stuff in the church and was hanging about outside smoking a cig and generally not �being ready� even tho Scarybride and Scarygroom had already arrived. Im ashamed to say that my first words to BF as I got out of the car, were "why the fuck havent you got your suit on?", which is neither polite nor ladylike. Scarybride called over "ahh, don�t give him a hard time. We cant start til he�s ready, he might as well take his time" which was pretty big hearted of her, considering. I think when it�s a second marriage, there isnt the same sense of rising panic about the occasion. Scarybride was more excited than a kid at Christmas � Ive pretty much NEVER seen a person more filled with glee. Scarygroom was similarly �cat with the cream� about the whole thing. When you consider that they arent exactly in the first flushes of youth, the pair of them, and, as far as I know, neither has ever won �most eligible� contests, it�s a real joy to see two people so utterly chuffed to bits to be getting married to each other. BF played like a dream � the song that The Scary�s had chosen for their exit from the church (when we were all supposed to stand up and follow them out) sounded so lovely that they walked on out of the church by themselves, and everyone else just stood around listening. We could see their heads outside the window, having a little kiss, and then they just, ummm, came back in and hung around in the doorway waiting for the music to finish. When it did finish, everyone clapped!

A few photos for posterity
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(I hope someone got one of me in my fabulous new hat!) then it was off to the restaurant for mushroom mille feuille, grilled salmon, local supercreamy icecream with stem ginger and bits of toffee in it, stinky cheeseboard and THIS CAKE:
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Yup. That�s all chocolate, folks. *drool*

Best bit of the speeches was ScaryGroom�s opening remarks: Well, I�m not really used to doing this. Usually, when I get up out of a warm seat with a piece of paper in my hand�it�s a much smaller room and I�m generally on my own!. The speeches were all mercifully short and very well thought out, which meant that almost everybody cried (I didn�t. I did have something in my eye at one point. Or it may have been hayfever).

Left the restaurant rally FAR too late and got stuck in traffic in Lyndhurst. Sent a text to the childminder to say I was on my way and managed to get back in just over 15 minutes which, if you know where I live, is amazing�and nothing to do with the positively suicidal speed at which I was driving.

Saturday was the usual pile of shite (grocery shopping, laundry, cooking etc) then BF hit on the dumbass idea of us ALL going to the workies for the disco. I ewas against it at first but eventually the kids persuaded me and we all walked down � with a big bag of drawing stuff in case the kids got bored.

�JB�s Roadshow� was three fat blokes with a big box of CDs (and, astonishingly, VINYL!) and enough flashing light effects boxes to have Jooj and Treacle goggle-eyed and slack-mouthed before they�d even played a tune. There was nothing remarkable about the evening except for remembering a few simple pleasures like showing kids your best 80�s dance moves and them BEING IMPRESSED. Took about half an hour to teach them a complicated step/turn/kick combo which can be done to just about any record from 1978-1985 and we were ROCKIN�. Actually, we were the only people dancing, but we didn�t care. Treacle spent the whole evening out on the floor, dancing and singing along to a whole load of songs I didn�t even know she knew (including Push The Button and I Will Survive). Eventually she had to take her tights off (and her orange rubber clogs) as she was just tooooo boiling. Jooj and I were a bit more selective, saving our energies for stuff we actually liked � including a mummie/daughter Lady Marmalade combo which Im cringing about a bit now as�.well�.she�s ELEVEN ferchristsake. She was laughing her head off at my �sexy dancing� which goes to show she doesn�t know what she�s talking about AT ALL as I was HOT! I think she thought I was being ironic. The little bastard.

As BF was working the whole weekend, I thought Id take Jooj with me on Sunday morning when I took Treac to her swimming lesson. Jooj had offered to swim with me while I was doing my lengths to see if she could make me go a bit faster, or to offer some advice on technique (or to save me if I looked like I was about to drown). She can easily to 40 or so lengths so it wouldve been a doddle for her. Also, as it was Mothers Day, I thought the Hot Daddie count would be through the roof as all the mummies would be having little lie-ins before waxing lyrical about the card Jemima and Josh had made at playschool. Jooj would have been a perfect alibi for me having to spend extra time in the jacuzzi drooling recovering from my extra tricky swim-workout.

Unfortunately, Treac�s swimming lesson was cancelled. No lesson pool and no lane pool either, as there was some kind of competitoin going on. Anticipating A WHOLE HOUR in the jacuzzi looking at mostly nekkid boy-flesh relaxing, I was quite prepared to pay for all of us to have Family Swim Time � especially when the kiosk boy gave me a token for free steam-room and sauna as we�d driven down there for nothing. Then he noticed Jooj. "How old�s she?", he asked. I told him she is 11.

11 is a magical age. Caught between grown up, teenager and child. It also means that she is considered too young to look after Treac while I go in the steam room (even tho she is by far the most competent swimmer amongst us � and Treac is second best). "Never mind the steamy stuff" says Mumsie "We can all go look at men swim about a bit and go in the jacuzzi". Kiosk Boy shook his head. 11 is TOO OLD for Sunday morning swim time � as that�s just for �parents and under 8�s". We just looked at each other. Then we went back to the car and went home. Still, Kiosk Boy let me keep the Free Sauna token for next time.

Had a great big Mothers Day brunch of ham-and-cheese croissants, custard pastries, strawberries, super thick vanilla yoghurt and �nanas when we got back. Then I opened my Mother Day presents. A necklace from Jooj, in various shades of grey and silver beads. Very nice, very stylish�and only a teeny bit tight on my neck. Treac made a papier mache bowl and decorated it with glitter paint. I think it�s a bonbonniere�.but there didn�t appear to be any bonbons in it � perhaps I have to supply my own.

Went to Carlo�s for icecream in the afternoon � we were supposed to be going to the common for a walk but it was too cold and windy and crap and I couldn�t be bothered. Had a fondue party at dinner time � just the four of us. There were forfeits for dropping stuff in the pot � standing on a chair singing "Im a Little Teapot", eating a piece of banana which had been dipped in the fondue (yik), and guess who had to put a bra on their head and run around the kitchen flapping their arms and going Bzzzbzzzbzzz like a fly while his girlfriend chased him with a spatula and the children laughed so much they were nearly sick.

Apparently, I am the "best fun mum of the whole world". I know this, cos my kids told me.

Back to work today and what a weird day it was! Today we had EVERY kind of weather, all squished into one day. When I left for work this morning it was warmish and sunny, then it clouded over, rained for a bit, got all windy, went overcast and sleety, SNOWED, cleared up and went sunny again, then�.just as I was leaving to come home�.thunder and lightning and hailstones as big as duck eggs. If we�ve used up all the weather already this week, what will happen tomorrow? Will it just be nothing?

S
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